I live in Siberia

On vast frozen tundra.

Last night it rained. Haboro was transformed into one huge block of ice. The wind picked up, and it is currently gusting at....lemme check....ah yes, 33 miles per hour. I about fell over 3 or 10 times while walking to work today.

Things are kinda crazy this week at the middle school. Ive got my last classes with some of the grades because they are graduating sometime in early march. I will see them in highschool again of course but for all the other teachers, its seems to be a pretty sentimental time. I think they really like this class of 3rd years. I do to for the most part. they are almost all great kids.

I am going to get my armor for kendo sometime this week or next. Once i give my messurements to my sensei she is gonna call the company and be like "i know someone who knows someone" and get me a sweet deal. So thats awesome. I cant wait. More to follow soon.

Oh i just remembered. In Judo, its totally fine (and in fact encouraged) to take off your belt and throw it on the ground. Also then you can stomp on it, use it as a whip, tie it around someones ankle and pull them, use it as a head-band, a jump-rope, or pretty much anything else you can think of. I was absolutely mortified the first time i saw one of these sins transgress. Now, like horribly violent movies, I am desensitized to it. I can watch them (movies, judo students) even though I know its wrong. (albeit funny)

in other news, the iNtel iMac is awesome. i cant believe how fast people are getting their code to universal binaries. its crazy. I keep learning all these things in OSX that it basically impossible to do in winXP. Like being able to instantly find a folder of pictures and make a slideshow without having to use something as buggy as explorer is amazing.

And for once the GUI makes sense.

although i do miss notepad. its such a horrible application that i love it for being ugly, like those pug dogs.

Anyways yeah. OSX. For example, the command to quit a program is "Q+squiggly thing". If you alt+tab the switching bar fades in and you can jump to active prorams. I was like "hmmm can i kill a process from the alt+tab menu?" I figured the most logical way to do it would be to combine alt+tab and "q".

OSX was all like "yeah, we got that."

same thing happens when you press f10. The screen dims for everything except the active window. Real nice for when you are watching a less-than-fullscreen movie and you want the rest of the monitor to be less distracting. so i pressed f10 and then started pressing tab by accident. Ooops. Didnt know I could do that. the OS then flipped through all my open windows as if I was using alt+tab but with a "live view".

then there is the expose feature which i cant get enough of. the zooming windows! If firefox increased my productivity 10-fold with tabed browsing, OSX raises that to the hundrth power. So i tried something. i opened 10 videos in quicktime, and then played them all at the same time. I pressed the "expose all windows button" and they all flew out and played their movies. I didnt know I could watch 10 movies at the same time. Actually i really cant, I get too confused. By its fun to know that I can, if I could.

iTunes is OK. The DRM is annoying. If i want to play songs that someone buys from the iTunes music store, I have to "iAuthorize" my computer to iPlay them. The whole workaround of "burn it to a CD and then rip it back" is annoying. Also iTunes suffers from a lack of plugins. I didnt really mind not being able to play my *.wmv files. WMV is crappy anyways because their metadata is always screwed up, whereas everyone can read mp3 tags. So i coverted them all to mp3, which i was going to do anyways. What bothered me was that in the meantime I had to use mplayer or WMP to listen to the tracks. iTunes has no plugin for wmv. It such a simple thing, I dont get it. Also I still cant find the "jump" feature which was like the only reason I used winamp on winXP. I'm sure its here somewhere but so far I cant figure it out.

While the computer is 100 times better than i could have imagined, my biggest critique of the imac is the lack of compatability in iChat from Mac to PC. It seems like its all over the forums: getting Mac to talk to PC over webcam is at best really difficult. My solution has been to fire up my 7 year old laptop and run eyeball chat so that I can talk to ginna. Its so lame that my pII 300mhz crappy lappy does the job better than my iMac. Like i am sitting there on the floor with my laptop (its now missing 5 keys) looking up at my shiny white machine thinking "why??? WHY??!?!?!?!"

(sigh)

Now, the actually iChat itself is ridonkulis. I did a video chat with rich (mac <--> mac) and it was unbelievable how clear the video was. There was not a single jump and the audio was perfect, even in full screen. whats that like 10,000 miles in meatspace? But try to get that to go to PC. Its not working.

if anyone has any solutions, let me know. until then i will just excuse myself to a dark corner and weep inwardly.

Ok, I have to do some actual work now.

much love
Jesse

What year is it? Snow Festival! My New Ferarri Ooops I Mean Imac, School

Happy February 17th! Its almost February 18th, which is a Saturday, which is awesome. That means I get to play with my new computer, which is really all I can think about now. Imagine driving one of these for six months, and then suddenly getting this. Thats kind of what it's like.

The screen is so massively huge, and my desk so small, that its like looking at a puppy. You know how puppys have GIANT heads and tiny little bodies? Actually someone somewhere did someresearch on that and there is an instinctual response to things with huge heads and little bodies and big eyes. People just naturally like them. Because if you like things like that, then you guard things like that, and then the Hyenas dont eat your baby Simbas. So, taking this anology to the utmost fridges of ridiculouness, I am guarding my computer with its huge monitor and big head and tiny body.

Seriously dont come near it, unless you have a treat, like a port of Photoshop for x86.

Yeah so the screen is huge. It's not so much a monitor as it is "dimensional gateway to another world". It's physically impossible to drag items into the trash can, because my mouse falls off the table before I am even half way across the screen. Its like a little excursion. We have to take breaks along the way, my file and I, and get our mouse back to a resonable spot.

I am considering a track ball. Steve, you got any suggestions?

So anyways, yeah. I am sure you will be sick of my talking about my zenith of majesty and power i mean my computer. Actually you probably already are. I know Ginna is ;)

So the big snow festival in Sapporo was fun. Big fun. The big let down however was that we couldnt go to the Sapporo-Beer-Garden because it was totally full. That was a big bummer. Most of my friends went skiing, I stayed in Sapporo with everyone that was left and walked around, looking at cool things, like ice sculptures (haha!). I wanted to go skiing but I would have had to rent everything. I cant stand rental equipment. Its so cheap and anti-awesome. Also its expensive.

The ice sculptures were by far the coolest part of the snow festival. They had all these really simple ones which were like "yawn" but at the end were the "professional" (what does that mean, anyways?) ice carvings that totally blew me away. They were so cool. The detail was amazing and they all had cool names like "Dragon Blue Green Fire Face" and stuff. They looked almost like they were statues made out of water with their amorphus shape being frozen in time for all to see...


...oh wait.


School is going ok. In Japan you graduate in March and start school again in April. That means the students only get a 2 or 3 week break between "school years". This is further compounded by the fact that even though its "2006", its still "2005" in Japan, because for many things the new year doesnt start until April. However, its far from Universal as to what year it actually is. So when talking to someone, like my Kendo Sensei, and she says "this year" but really means "2005", I get highly confused. But some people say "last year" and they mean "2005", however they can also mean "anytime before April 2005", which is the "Japanese" last year. However if you dont know that they know that you dont know, then its all but impossible to find out what year it is, because this is actually year "Emporer Hesei's 18th year of reign". So if you say that, then you could mean either "2006" or "2005", which is just crazy. I carry around my PDA so that I can open it up and point at the date.

So yeah. Besides the year changing in April, so does everything else. Cherry blossoms, animal migrations....peoples lives. Eveything chages around April. Eveyone picks up and leaves and thats sad. My favorite Japanese Teacher of English (JTE) is leaving the middle school at the end of March. Shes moving to Sapporo to get married. The new teacher might be awesome, but I dont know. Also my friend Nobuki, who teachers English at the high school, is leaving for Tokyo. That really sucks cause hes one of the few people I hang out with. Lastly, in my dairy of suckyness, my neighboors whom with i eat dinner with and teach english are most likely moving as well. Yama-san's husband Sekihara-san is a teacher too, and he commutes like 45 minutes everyday. So they want to move and probably will.

Yay, all my friends are leaving. So thats awesome, except the exact opposite. At least ive got Kendo. And iMac. And Ginna. They are my precious. But not in that order ;)

In other news, Karaoke is going well:

bravenworld: some of the karaoke places have the most random music
S founder: I'm sure
bravenworld: like one night i sang "Tommyknockers" by Blind Guardian
bravenworld: everyone hated me
bravenworld: it was so funny
S founder: LOL
S founder: That's so not meant for karaoke
bravenworld: lol
bravenworld: nope, like, not at all
bravenworld: and it was some horrible midi sample
S founder: obviously
bravenworld: hahaha


Well, I think thats about it for now. I had some more interest in the photo I took for my dads last flight with delta, so if that goes through I could be selling some more prints! Thats really exciting. I'll keep you posted.

pictures for you!

The streets of Sapporo....and someones shoulder.

The cronicles of Narnia snow sculpture. it was about 12 meters high. I wish i had some ice axes and/or crampons. I totally would have climbed up it.

There were all these frozen fish and sea creatures, as well as giant mythical beasts like this huge thing here. People said it was a "crab" but i beg to differ. Most ignorant people do mistake giant underwater spiders for "crabs".

...I dont even know what to say. Welcome to Japan, folks.
(I didnt take this picture, one of my friends did. notice the lack of snow.)

At the top of the JR Station tower in Sapporo. I thought the wall was interesting.

You are always having a good time if you're sitting in the happy chair. Always.

Wow! What the hell is it!

Glowing Ice Castle? Yeah, we got that.

Dear Aslan: Plese save me from the huge bear made of snow. Thanks, Jesse.

I would like to think they meant well. And they actually did. But the translation is priceless. Especially because its actually true.

This thing is gonna look so cool in the summer time!

Yay.

Help! Im stuck in a huge block of ice!

out
me

The Japan Times Online - Advanced Search -

The Japan Times Online: Ghenkis Khan In Tokyo?

I love the Ghengis Khan. Its a really simply way of cooking a lot of cheap food. And it comes from Hokkaido. All you do is toss stuff on to a hot plat till its edible. Then eat. Yay!

Anyways my friend sent me this link and I thought you my like to read it. the funniest part is the quote about the English directions. Wow.

"''Toss veggies to the edge of the grill . . . Spread the meat to the grill with fizzle to the sizzle. Wait till heat get smokin' flava with da juice drippin' to the charcoal. Then eat up with dippin' to da bangin' soy sauce.''"

Yeah so thats funny.


In other news, they are having a problem charging my shiny new card for my shiny new MAC. I think I have it worked out. Luckily there was a really nice lady who I could call and talk to in English. I was affraid of doing it in Japanese and saying something like "Yes, thats right Tanaka-San, I DO want to buy the whole inventory!"

Anways, maybe its a good thing because the computer isnt going to come whilst I am in Sapporo. I am going to Sapps town for the "Yuki Omatsuri" or the "Snow Festival".

Also it seems like my "enter" key just broke. Thats so awesome. I never use it anyways. never.

You dont know how hard I had to just smash it down to get it to go down two lines so that I could start a new paragraph. bye!

Its still not here

ok well it was mearly days ago that I orderd my computer and even though I shouldnt resonabily expect it until Friday, its now tuesday and its still not here. Sometimes when I come home I imagine that it will somehow have magically appeared on my desk, all setup and ready to go. Like, is that even possible? I have no idea.

out.

PS
if you listen to internet radio, i suggest pointing your player here: http://207.200.96.227:8004/ (it runs Shoutcast, Nulsofts streaming codec BTW) its perhaps the craziest thing I have ever heard, and I cant stop listening to it.

"Do You Have The Sky In America?"

Ok so last week I went to "Houikuen" Kindergarten and taught the 5 and 6 year olds a lesson on animal names in English. Pretty standard stuff. Songs, games, posters...the works. After I was done teaching we ate lunch. By 12 it was time to go but I didnt want to leave because that would mean trudging up hill back to the BOE (Board Of Education). So I sat in the teachers room with the teachers.

They were creating some sort of medal or pin for each student. They were made out of paper and involved a lot of cutting to get the shapes out (i.e. Stars, Hearts, Flowers, Magical Rainbow Pandas...whatever). I decided I would help out while talking with the teachers, so I picked up the first available pair of scissors and began cutting along the dotted lines.

That’s what I saw it start to happen. That’s when I knew I should have just let it be. "leave the scissors alone" I had told myself. "you dont need to help out" I had said inside my head. But I did anyways. And that’s when the teacher to my left began the slow, steady routine that I've seen a million times. That wasnt what shocked me. It was that she was doing it now, about this.

Let me back-track.

You see whenever I do something in Japan, whether giving speeches in Japanese or simply drinking a glass of water, it is instantly viewed as a marvel...a wonder of the world. At first this was awesome, because I felt like a rock-star. Then it became annoying, and now I try as hard as I can to avoid it. When I came back to America for break to see Ginna, I thought for the first few days that something was wrong with me...No one was looking at me or cared one bit what I did. Then I realized "oh wait this is totally normal" and it felt so wonderful to have my warm and fuzzy "blanket-of-anonymity" (+20 to Americans. When used in conjunction with Japan, player gets a penalty of -1,000)

So I have finally gotten to the point after 7 months that I can usually eat a piece a food with a pair of chops sticks without someone wetting themselves. I thought I was safe.

I was wrong.

So yeah there I was, clipping away at a small green flower, when the teacher next to me slowly began to stop cutting. She was winding down, gripped in utter disbelief. Slowly the scissors stopped moving and the jaw dropped. All the other people in the room became quiet. I looked up at her totally stunned face. She put her scissors down amid utterances of "oh my goodness you are so good at cutting things" and with all the effort a human can muster, she asked me:

"Do you have scissors in America?"

I wanted to scream.

It was like she couldn’t comprehend that anyone non-Japanese could possibly do the things she had learned how to do. I can handle ethnocentrism when its reasonable. Even un-reasonable is fine.

However, it is so far beyond reason to ask someone if their country has scissors that I was at a complete loss for words. I was as equally stunned. I take it as my charged duty to portray myself as an individual and I enjoy the challenge God has given me to express myself and show people that the world is a much bigger place than Japan, and that foreigners aren’t dangerous. I think that’s what Internationalization is all about.

If I had been thinking quicker I would have said what Steve T. had said:

"nope, no scissors. All we have is this one knife" That would have been funny.

I didn’t have to say anything however because all the other teachers instantly began to make fun of her and throw things at her for saying something so crazy. I too was laughing, but I felt slightly disturbed (and still do). I just cant believe that a 35 year old educated individual can honestly believe that Japan is the only country that can use scissors, and whats more is be so dumb-founded to learn otherwise.

All in all I’ve come to realize that my "different-ness" is inversely-proportional to how hard I try to participate. If I actively try to do things here and be a part of the community, then I get treated more wonderfully and equally than I ever have before. However, when I remain aloof and do things on my own, my status as "Strange Wonder From Across the Sea" becomes re-instated. Of course there is a growing period, such as the case with the scissors. Also I think there is a "ridiculousl" period, which doesnt really ever end.

This made me think of other crazy things I have been asked. Here is a list off the top of my head:

"Can you use chopsticks?" (at least 5 or 600 times)

"Do you have chopsticks in America?"

"Do you have wheel-barrows in America?"

"Do you have used cars in America?" (perhaps I missed something in the translation on this one)

"Do you have scissors in America?"

"Do you have shrimp in America?"

The list goes on. At least I will be able to say with complete certainty when I look back on all this that not a single day was ever boring or repetitive.

peace
JB


PS
if you need me, I'll be practicing my scissoring. Its been a while.

PPS
I heard a story from another JET who said her friend (who was a women) was asked by another woman in her office "do you have your monthly period in America?". I didnt believe the story when I first got here, but now...I dont know. Its certainly possible, and thats scary.

I wish I had a car...

....I should buy one. I dont really like walking miles in this.

Why I love Penny Arcade

Today gabe wrote:

"I’ve been working on a lot of different projects recently. Finally I think its okay to give you a look at a couple of them. In order to view these hot sneak peeks you will of course need to join our Penny Arcade Supreme™ service. This is a program I’ve designed to reward our very special fans with exclusive content. Unlike other similar services ours has no subscription fee and requires no passwords. PA Supreme content will simply be displayed right here on the front page along with our regular updates."

Penny-Arcade

An Embarrassment of Riches

So my friend Ollie lent me a book and i was reading the back cover. At the bottom of the editor's summary was the line:

"This embarrassment of literary riches is a must for all Gene Wolfe fans and anyone who loves a good tale beautifully told"

I never knew "embarrassment" could also mean "vast treasure trove."

So thats cool.